501 Things to Do with a Zombie by J.C. Richards

By J.C. Richards

Zombies are, or have been, humans too! get away routes, safety plans, survival kits. sufficient is sufficient! Zombies have got a nasty rap, and it is time the redeeming features of those brain-eating (but most likely lovely) creatures come to gentle. input 501 activities with a Zombie. within, you will see that the undead make the fitting sidekicks for almost something you could have occurring. cannot persuade a blood brother to affix you in karaoke? No concerns! A Zombie by no means suffers from degree fright! trying to take a leisurely walk throughout the neighborhood farmers' industry? Zombies be aware of the key to selecting out the most up to date tomatoes. have to negotiate a brand new cell-phone agreement? carry a Zombie alongside to get out of the two-year dedication (he can strong-arm the revenues rep—that is, except it truly is missing). yes, Zombies could have rotting flesh and nasty viruses, yet do not all of us have our faults? Open your brain and open this ebook for encouraged rules on how we will be able to all learn how to get alongside.

Show description

Read Online or Download 501 Things to Do with a Zombie PDF

Similar satire books

Gulliver's Travels

Shipwrecked and solid adrift, Lemuel Gulliver wakes to discover himself on Lilliput, an island inhabited through little humans, whose top makes their quarrels over model and popularity appear ridiculous. His next encounters - with the crude giants of Brobdingnag, the philosophical Houyhnhnms and brutish Yahoos - supply Gulliver new, sour insights into human behaviour.

Unicorn Western (Unicorn Western, Book 1)

Forged out from the paranormal state of the area and into the loss of life barren region of the Sands past, Marshal Clint Gulliver and his unicorn Edward have ultimately came upon peace within the small and dusty city of Solace. For the 1st time seeing that leaving the area, Clint has dared to be at liberty, getting hitched to his bride to be, Mai.

The Messiah of Morris Avenue: A Novel

The acclaimed satirist and bestselling writer of pop Joe poses the query, might we realize the messiah if he seemed at the present time? and supplies, within the phrases of Frank McCourt, "just what the rustic wishes now--a solid dose of merriment within the face of crawthumping righteousness. "

In the no longer so far-off way forward for Tony Hendra's novel, the tide of righteousness--in the shape of executions, barking evangelists, tank-like SUVs, and a film run completely through the Christian right--has swept the state. other than the non-white, the non-Christian, and the non-wealthy, all are believers. one of the skeptics is a washed-up journalist named Johnny Greco, who hears of a media-shy younger guy referred to as "Jay"roaming via ghettos, therapeutic the ailing, and tossing off miracles. Soft-spoken and shabbily dressed, Jay is an not going savior for this antsy and illiberal the United States. yet as he makes his rounds, gathers fans, and makes livid enemies one of the righteous powers that be, Johnny reveals it tougher and tougher to doubt him.

The Jokers

Who're the jokers? The jokers are the govt, and the most important joker of all is the governor, a bug-eyed, strutting, rapacious personality of unequaled incompetence who presides over the anonymous center jap urban the place this bubbling comedy via Albert Cossery is decided. The jokers also are the revolutionaries, no much less bumbling and no much less infatuated with the trimmings of energy than the govt they oppose.

Additional info for 501 Things to Do with a Zombie

Example text

Go to Europe (there's nothing like seeing the Sistine Chapel for the first time with a Zombie) 332. Go bowling 333. Join a Conga line 334. Space tourism 335. Make balloon animals 335. Make balloon animals 336. Go to a water park 337. Go to a concert 338. Sing “Sweet Caroline” 339. Spell M-I-S-S-I-S-S-I-P-P-I 340. Go to the Kentucky Derby 341. Play HORSE 342. Play Bingo 343. Google 344. YAMMY GORILLAS 345. Use duct tape 342. Play Bingo 346. Collect decorative swords 347. Attend the Academy Awards 348.

Slip 'n' slide 360. Go through a corn maze 361. Run with the bulls 362. Stay up all night 363. Tickle 364. Design a t-shirt 365. Tie dye 366. Barbecue 364. Design a t-shirt 367. Diagram a sentence 367. Diagram a sentence 368. Play Duck, Duck, Goose! 369. Attend a something-palooza 370. Make a dream catcher 371. Make a lemonade stand 372. Make a five-year plan 371. Make a lemonade stand 376. Visit an island destination 373. Do the chicken dance 374. Slam dance 375. See Stars on Ice 376. Visit an island destination 377.

Be a movie extra 265. Feed the pigeons 266. Have a picnic 267. Go bathing-suit shopping 267. Go bathing-suit shopping 268. Go to a demolition derby 269. Jury duty (it's a civil obligation for all undead) 270. Get a deep-tissue massage 271. Have a tea party 272. Go to Starbucks 271. Have a tea party 273. Wear a Hawaiian shirt 274. Play catch 275. Make soap 276. Go to a fancy car show 277. Take a Polaroid 278. Ski 279. Wii 280. Play Twister 281. Do a tongue twister (try saying “Zombie oozes at the zoo” three times fast) 282.

Download PDF sample

Rated 4.58 of 5 – based on 3 votes